you know what?

you know what? i think i really need to stop talking to everyone about my problem. i need to stop telling people how i really feel. i need to stop expressing my emotion to every single person i know. i think i just need to stop pouring my heart out to anyone

because you know what? no one does care about my freaking problem. no one. all people care is about my story and how it would make a good gossip or maybe people just want to intervene my business. people dont care at all. all they do is giving me basic advice so that i will think that i can trust them. but that's not true. some people these days are so selfish, they act and seem like they care when they actually dont.

and when i say im sad. im not actually sad. it is an accumulation of a hundred thousand feelings that ive been keeping from ages and i dont even know how to describe it so i just simply say that i am sad when im actually not. those feelings are so complicated and frustrating and indescribable.

so if i tell you that im sad, dont trust me because i barely feel sad
and if im still telling you about my problem or just simply saying how i feel then you better not break that trust because it is a real deal for me.